The Itine-Rant Philosopher: The Odyssey

View out the back porch window after the storm...

Having spent four days in San Fran for a conference where I basically stood in a booth and performed demonstrations until I was hoarse, I was ready to fly home. I was hoping the red-eye was not going to destroy me like they usually do, counting on being able to sleep some in my complementary upgraded seat. Oh, but the ghods had other things in mind.

Upon arriving at SFO I was informed that there was a problem with my Detroit-Cleveland leg - that being the ticket agents could see it but it had a 'mystery code'. After 45 minutes of sleuthing on the part of the ticket agent, they figured out it meant that the flight was cancelled. Lovely.

After further review, we determined there were no really good ways to get me home. Most would have me arriving Sunday afternoon or Monday morning. With so many cancellations due to the impending storm and very full flights all weekend there were no good options for empty seats. We finally settled on SFO to Newark with the logic that they had the most flights to CLE should the Newark - CLE leg go South. Foresight? Not.

After arriving in Newark from the flight from hell - bumpy, long and red-eye-ish - I managed to stumble to my connecting flight. Once again, getting the last minute complimentary upgrade and sitting in first with a (virgin) bloody mary and a nice seat I felt a surge of confidence as we taxied to the runway. Silly me! Once we arrived at runway 251s we were turned back to the gate - cancelled. Rebooking was a nightmare - no real options aside from MONDAY NIGHT!

Myself and four other intrepid adventurers opted to fly into Pittsburgh and drive the 1.5 hours home. That flight was an adventure in itself - with both flight attendants getting knocked to the floor with turbulence and the beverage cart crashing into the wall and spilling crap everywhere. At one point, as I was in the very back seat of the plane, myself and another guy were helping the hapless Stew stay on the floor while the plane tried its best to cast us all up to the ceiling. Nice.

Arriving in P-burgh was a relief, albeit a short-lived one. Snow began to spit from an angry sky as I drove out of the rental car lot in my nondescript, but all-wheel-drive, Saturn. With every mile it built itself into a real snowfall. At the Ohio border the snow went from being an annoyance to a real concern. The closer I came to Cleveland, the more hazardous things became - but stopping at this point was not an option.

After nearly three hours of driving I arrived home to find huge drifts blocking my driveway. After five attempts, forward and back, I was able to shove the rental car into the driveway. Opening the door of the car was an adventure as the snow was well above the doorwell. I stepped out of the car to accumulation above my knees and slogged into the house covered in heavy, wet snow.

The next morning was an adventure into itself with driving back up to CLE to get my redirected bags (one of which is destroyed) and my car. However, by this point the sun was shining and things were a little better on the roads.

Is there a lesson here? Not really. The only thing that I did note was that after years of traveling like this that I was able to not get stressed/pissed/angry. Grain of salt, baby. Grain of Salt...