CIA Takes a New Hard Line in the War on Terror in Afghanistan...

Um...you can't really write better copy than the Washington Post article I have posted below:

Little Blue Pills Among the Ways CIA Wins Friends in Afghanistan

By Joby Warrick
Washington Post Staff Writer
Friday, December 26, 2008; A01



The Afghan chieftain looked older than his 60-odd years, and his bearded face bore the creases of a man burdened with duties as tribal patriarch and husband to four younger women. His visitor, a CIA officer, saw an opportunity, and reached into his bag for a small gift.

Four blue pills. Viagra.

"Take one of these. You'll love it," the officer said. Compliments of Uncle Sam.

The enticement worked. The officer, who described the encounter, returned four days later to an enthusiastic reception. The grinning chief offered up a bonanza of information about Taliban movements and supply routes -- followed by a request for more pills.

For U.S. intelligence officials, this is how some crucial battles in Afghanistan are fought and won. While the CIA has a long history of buying information with cash, the growing Taliban insurgency has prompted the use of novel incentives and creative bargaining to gain support in some of the country's roughest neighborhoods, according to officials directly involved in such operations.

In their efforts to win over notoriously fickle warlords and chieftains, the officials say, the agency's operatives have used a variety of personal services. These include pocketknives and tools, medicine or surgeries for ailing family members, toys and school equipment, tooth extractions, travel visas, and, occasionally, pharmaceutical enhancements for aging patriarchs with slumping libidos, the officials said.

"Whatever it takes to make friends and influence people -- whether it's building a school or handing out Viagra," said one longtime agency operative and veteran of several Afghanistan tours. Like other field officers interviewed for this article, he spoke on the condition of anonymity when describing tactics and operations that are largely classified.

Officials say these inducements are necessary in Afghanistan, a country where warlords and tribal leaders expect to be paid for their cooperation, and where, for some, switching sides can be as easy as changing tunics. If the Americans don't offer incentives, there are others who will, including Taliban commanders, drug dealers and even Iranian agents in the region.

The usual bribes of choice -- cash and weapons -- aren't always the best options, Afghanistan veterans say. Guns too often fall into the wrong hands, they say, and showy gifts such as money, jewelry and cars tend to draw unwanted attention.

"If you give an asset $1,000, he'll go out and buy the shiniest junk he can find, and it will be apparent that he has suddenly come into a lot of money from someone," said Jamie Smith, a veteran of CIA covert operations in Afghanistan and now chief executive of SCG International, a private security and intelligence company. "Even if he doesn't get killed, he becomes ineffective as an informant because everyone knows where he got it."

The key, Smith said, is to find a way to meet the informant's personal needs in a way that keeps him firmly on your side but leaves little or no visible trace.

"You're trying to bridge a gap between people living in the 18th century and people coming in from the 21st century," Smith said, "so you look for those common things in the form of material aid that motivate people everywhere."

Among the world's intelligence agencies, there's a long tradition of using sex as a motivator. Robert Baer, a retired CIA officer and author of several books on intelligence, noted that the Soviet spy service was notorious for using attractive women as bait when seeking to turn foreign diplomats into informants.

"The KGB has always used 'honey traps,' and it works," Baer said. For American officers, a more common practice was to offer medical care for potential informants and their loved ones, he said. "I remember one guy we offered an option on a heart bypass," Baer said.

For some U.S. operatives in Afghanistan, Western drugs such as Viagra were just part of a long list of enticements available for use in special cases. Two veteran officers familiar with such practices said Viagra was offered rarely, and only to older tribal officials for whom the drug would hold special appeal. While such sexual performance drugs are generally unavailable in the remote areas where the agency's teams operated, they have been sold in some Kabul street markets since at least 2003 and were known by reputation elsewhere.

"You didn't hand it out to younger guys, but it could be a silver bullet to make connections to the older ones," said one retired operative familiar with the drug's use in Afghanistan. Afghan tribal leaders often had four wives -- the maximum number allowed by the Koran -- and aging village patriarchs were easily sold on the utility of a pill that could "put them back in an authoritative position," the official said.

Both officials who described the use of Viagra declined to discuss details such as dates and locations, citing both safety and classification concerns.

The CIA declined to comment on methods used in clandestine operations. One senior U.S. intelligence official familiar with the agency's work in Afghanistan said the clandestine teams were trained to be "resourceful and agile" and to use tactics "consistent with the laws of our country."

"They learn the landscape, get to know the players, and adjust to the operating environment, no matter where it is," the official said. "They think out of the box, take risks, and do what's necessary to get the job done."

Not everyone in Afghanistan's hinterlands had heard of the drug, leading to some awkward encounters when Americans delicately attempted to explain its effects, taking care not to offend their hosts' religious sensitivities.

Such was the case with the 60-year-old chieftain who received the four pills from a U.S. operative. According to the retired operative who was there, the man was a clan leader in southern Afghanistan who had been wary of Americans -- neither supportive nor actively opposed. The man had extensive knowledge of the region and his village controlled key passages through the area. U.S. forces needed his cooperation and worked hard to win it, the retired operative said.

After a long conversation through an interpreter, the retired operator began to probe for ways to win the man's loyalty. A discussion of the man's family and many wives provided inspiration. Once it was established that the man was in good health, the pills were offered and accepted.

Four days later, when the Americans returned, the gift had worked its magic, the operative recalled.

"He came up to us beaming," the official said. "He said, 'You are a great man.' "

"And after that we could do whatever we wanted in his area."



Who would have thought that the war on terror could be won by solving ED? We should start air-dropping that new KY His-n-Hers along with starter packs of Cialis to calm the local population's ire towards our occupying forces. The upside is that there will be a very quiet initial period of peace and the potential sudden cardiac death of Mullah Omar. The downside...well in about 18 years there are going to be a lot more anrgy young men to recruit to jihad...

Its been a while...

...but I'm still up and running. I've been working, a lot. Which means I've been on the road, a lot. The election came and went and we are all watching what's next. Its actually pretty exciting but all of the shine is rubbing off with the cock-up being made of things by our outgoing lame duck. At some point I will comment on the various bailouts, disasters of principal and other tidbits but now I'm just too tired to be cranky. I was in Baltimore, DC and Chicago this week with two 4 AM wake ups to get to the airport in time and I'm ready for Friday.

We had a great Thanksgiving up here with Mom & Dad and the kids but missed Brother Matt, Sis Viva and little Fi - I'll be with them for Christmas but unfortunately won't be able to take the kids with me...this year. There are pics of the adventure on the facebook page if folks want to see them.

To sleep, perchance to dream...

Peace

Quick Hit

I went to look at bbc.com to see a more international perspective of the debates. I found this little gem that is straight out of the Onion. It is their "People of the USA" one sentence description each comment from the common folk on the debate last night. It is really worth a look and a laugh.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/americas/7639261.stm

My favorite pull quote from the article found on the same page can be found below. It is one of the things that resonated strongly for me last night and I really wanted to see how it played on the world stage. It was Sen. McCain's description of Putin.

'Tough-guy sound-bite'

You can sum it up with the exchange on the issue of Russia - whose petro-dollar fuelled resurgence as a regional power is going to test the next president throughout his term of office.
Mr McCain recalled looking into the eyes of Russia's Vladimir Putin

Mr McCain was able to describe meeting Vladimir Putin, "looking into his eyes and seeing three letters, K, G and B" - a reference to the old Soviet intelligence agency for which Mr Putin once worked.

Does it sound corny to foreign ears, with a slight B-movie flavour to it? It probably does. I would say in America it plays much better as a tough-guy sound-bite, suggestive of a president who knows how to stand up to Moscow.

Mr Obama's answer on Russia rambled quite a bit and veered off into a dissertation on the need to develop alternative energy sources - not his first of the night.

You could see the logic - Russia is an oil exporter and one of America's biggest problems is dependence on imported oil.

But it felt a little bookish and laboured - you could sense which reply would play better in American living rooms.

You can see that the Senator's comments were heard loud and clear over in Moscow. Cold War II anyone? What a jackass!

One more thing, let's all prepare to watch with relish (and onions!) the VP debate on Thursday. The chum is in the proverbial water after her interview with Katie Couric this past week. I think we all can admit to ourselves we were thinking she might be a ditz when she actually cemented the opinion while during her attempt to say she has foreign policy experience because Alaska is next to Russia. As my pa-paw would say, "That'n is as dumb as a bag of hammers." And if you needed yet another reason to be leery of her, check out this pull quote, again from bbc.com:

She was baptised a Catholic as an infant but attended a Pentecostal church in Wasilla - her hometown since her parents moved to Alaska from Idaho when she was three months old - for many years. She now attends Wasilla Bible Church, a non-denominational, evangelical church. The Associated Press reports that the church is promoting a conference that promises to convert gays into heterosexuals through the power of prayer.

Oh yeah, I want her to be our next VP. Better to have Satan Jr. shooting his friends in the face - at least he is competent enough to systematically ruin our reputation on the world stage while making billions for his "hunting buddies".

37 more days until we can all say President Obama, which is a MUCH better prospect than having to say Vice-President Palin without bursting out in derisive laughter...Enjoy it!

Walking in Memphis...

So, here I am on yet another airplane on my way home from yet another meeting. This time I was in Memphis, TN for a 19 hour stint. Unfortunately, I had to stay at the airport and had no rental car so I didn’t venture into town. Instead, I had one more wonderful experience in a Holiday Inn...one that should have been clear-cut to the foundation years ago. Aside from the filth accumulated in every available crack and crevice, it was semi-acceptable. No, no it really wasn’t. It was gross. The hallway carpets had that dark tint to the center where grime had been perpetually ground into the fibers. The “hotel bar” – which was a makeshift little thing in the lobby – had all sorts of dusty crap crammed into its shelves like old calculators, bottle spouts and out-of-date table tents. I think one of them advertised for the 1984 Superbowl party. The ‘bellman’ was a 450 pound African-American gentleman named Daunte whose claim to fame had to be winning the Nathan’s Famous Hot Dog Eating contest three years in a row until that Kobiashi guy came along. He had to stop pushing some lady’s baggage cart about every 20 feet to take a breather and a bite of Twinkie.

Speaking of food…the food. Ugh. It is unfair to every comestible on the globe to call it ‘food’. I ate late because my meetings kind of ran over so I ordered something simple. Nacho chips to snack on and a steak salad. The nachos were the round kind that comes in the 24 pound bag from Sam’s Club accompanied by Ortega’s best canned salsa. Yummy! The steak on my salad was MICROWAVED into a slab of grey leather. It might have been the vilest protein ever placed on a soggy, wilted bed of greens saturated with no-name Caesar dressing. Et tu Brute? I awoke this morning with significant stomach distress – and just nodded to myself in the bathroom mirror. I deserved this fate…

At any rate, here is my ‘room with a view’. Not much to see here. If you look really closely you can see the ladies of the night hovering around the motorcourt next door. The chlorofluorocarbon haze over the airport is particularly poignant in the evening gloaming. As I gazed into the parking lot and deeply inhaled the fetid air in my weary hotel room I realized that it still beats the hell out of digging ditches under the August sun. Yet I had to admit that there had been better digs before and likely would be again – if every hotel room were like this one we would all bring sleeping bags and crash in the park when we travel. Likely my favorite aspect of the room was when I went to climb into the shower this morning and noted the various long red hairs stuck to the curtain…which wasn’t as bad as the curly-whirlies gathered around the drain. Let’s just say I showered in my socks…

A smile was inspired as I boarded the little Continental Regional Jet this morning behind Lorenzen Wright, 6’11” center for the Seattle/Kansas City Supersonics or whatever the hell they are going to be called. He had to nearly touch his toes to get on the plane. Nice kid – covered in about 50k worth of bling. His watch alone had about 5 pounds of diamonds on it. It’s nice to know that a 2.5 points and 4 rebounds per game average over an NBA career can outfit a person so nicely. He very fortunately for their athletic trainers scored an exit row seat.

I get home today about 11 and will finish the day on the phone and doing some computer work. There’s some cleaning left to do before the fam comes in this weekend. We are really excited to have everyone coming in and just wish Father Wally could also be here. We’ll miss you, Papa! I promise to take lots of pictures of the grandkids playing together. We are watching the weather to see if the Indians’ game on Friday night will still happen – it’s looking a little blustery on the radar but it is Northeast Ohio. As they say, if you don’t like the weather wait 5 minutes and it will change.

See you laters, taters…

They say it's your birthday! Happy birthday to you!

John's Pony Ride

In the ultimate contest of over-compensation, children's birthdays have gotten out of control in a way that rivals the best BMW vs. Lexus in the driveway battle of the Joneses. So my son John's third birthday this past weekend eclipsed that of Prince Andrew and is going to be broadcast on MTV's Blingingest Birthday Bashes III. I brought three party trays - cheese, fruit...the usual suspects. His mom pulled out the stops with a moon bounce, trampoline, pony rides, swimming, catered food, and enough beer for a weekend at the Kennedy compound in August.

There were about 50 or so people who stopped in at some point; friends, family and well-wishers. Aly and I hung out with John most of the time, which involved chasing him from one activity to the other. There were some minor tears when Choloe the teacup rat-dog nipped John's finger but no blood was spilled (except when I tossed the dog in the chipper-shredder dontcha know?) We were able to see Jeff and Dianne and their two daughters, both lovely young ladies. Sean and Doreen were there with their two kids, Ryan is getting to be just flat out huge. Aunt and Uncles abounded with Uncles John and Alex, Aunts AJ and Bubba in attendance. Of course, John noticed little of this as he was enthralled with all of the kids bouncing around.

I got the kids a Wii for their birthday as Aly's 15th is coming up next week. She is in the other room doing the Wii Fit Yoga class as we speak. Its a pretty cool game, but when it tells you your BMI its only slightly depressing. I'm sure there will be more pictures to post of Aly's smaller gathering. She has requested a videogame party here so the kids can play Wii and Rockband and have me cook for them. I do good junk food.

We are in the final planning stages for the upcoming trip of my brother and sister-in-law, niece and Mom this weekend. Everyone is coming in on Friday and staying until Monday. We are going to an Indians game on Friday, cooking out on Saturday and spending the day with John on Sunday. There may be some sightseeing along the way - after all, there are SO many wonderful sights here in Northeast Ohio!

Have a great week everyone!

OMG I'M IN NJ!!! - Room with a view I wish I didn't have...

Yes, I am in Ramsey, NJ. Where is this? well its right here Ramsey, NJWhat do you think? Looks real nice. I am here with my co-workers at a Sheraton near our corporate offices for this week-long training session. Luckily, I have awesome co-workers and fun bosses that are making it as interesting as possible. Here you see a picture of our meeting room, which has no view as the curtains are drawn so we can see the projector screen. That's ok because, being in a U-shaped table format, we get to stare at each other all week!

This would be the view from my lovely Worst Western hotel room. Its a second-floor room right above the unique little college-type bar that is actually IN the hotel. Tonight is "2 Dollar Bring Your Own Mug Night" where you could bring a trash can in and fill it with Busch for two bills. So nice! I'm sure I'll sleep well tonight to the drunken thumping below. I'll make sure to add a photo of the exterior of the hotel so you can appreciate the cheesy goodness. Ok, lunch break is over. Time for more learnin'! Blog you later.

Room with a View - Chicago Deja Vu

So here I am in Chicago again, this time for a Trauma Conference that lasts through Saturday night. Its such a beautiful neighborhood as you can tell. Actually its right on Sourth Michigan Ave. and across from Grant Park. Its a bit of a dump, and I should have known that when their marquee said "Welcome Lallapallooza!". I can imagine the previous occupants of the room were here for a more fun purpose, as evidenced from the left over X tabs in the bathroom. I did score a corner room, so I have multiple views from which to choose. The first is of some nice buildings south of the lake. I have no idea what they are, but its urban living at its best. If you look closely you can see the subway line that barrels through about every five minutes or so - that should make for some good sleepin!

My northward view is of Lake Michigan, albeit obliquely. Its kind of cool knowing that I can go out there and walk on the shore, which I shall do at some point. We are supposed to have stunning weather here this week - like 82 and sunny every day. Such a shame that I will be looking at pasty-faced trauma surgeons the entire time and listening to the glories of new skin adhesives in treating slashing knife wounds. I'm kind of unhappy about being here if you couldn't tell. I mean, I could understand one to two days of trade show madness, but there are only going to be like 150 doctors here. Do you not think they are going to make their way through the hall the first day and it will be as vacant as Rosie O'Donnel's cupboards the rest of the time? I can already hear the crickets as 50 medical reps snooze off their hangovers while muzak quietly hums overhead. "I love you baby, and if its quite alright I need you baby, to warm my lonely nights..." Lord have mercy on whatever soul I might have left.

Looking just, well, down we see industrious city workers struggling through yet another day of urban toil. Hail, ye mighty warriors of labor in your continuing upward battle against the oppressor! You can tell the day's supply of doughnuts and coffee are running dangerously low, as the time tips towards Miller and pretzels. No comment.

Likely the best room with a view was the one my feline friend Luna had this morning of a snacking chipmonk outside our slider on the porch. He chilled out in this spot for about 10 minutes and drove her into cat-sanity and distraction. I had to put vodka in her water dish to calm her down. Ummmmm...vodka.

Have a great day everyone!

My Kind of Town...Room with a View (sort of...)

Ok I was in Chicago for four of the longest days of my life last week to attend the American Academy of Dermatology show. It was a mix of good and bad, the 'longest days' moniker being assigned because the trade show primarily sucked ass and seemed to last an eternity working the floor. We were in the deepest bowels of the Hyatt Hotel near the lakeshore and I kept expecting to see guys with lamps on their hats walk by it was so dark and dank. It was absolutely gorgeous outside the entire time, which didn't help. Also making it worse was the presence of Lollapallooza which I couldn't attend. I did manage to find a great little jazz club which had a combo playing Davis and Coltraine, that was a good time. Otherwise, I lounged in my room and slept a lot. I didn't get to take a picture out the window, which was just not exciting at all as I looked out into an alley and a dumpster, so I just included this picture of the hotel. I'm back in Chicago again this week for a trade show that the hours of the exhibit hall run 6:30 AM - 5:30 PM - WTF is that all about? I'll take a picture from my room at the freaking Best Western. Adios.

A Room with a View - Part Dos

Columbus, Ohio - from the Renaissance Hotel's 16th floor overlooking downtown. Not too bad as views go, not too great either.

A Room With A View

So...when I am out of town, and I have been out of town a LOT of late, I tend to look out the window first thing to help me remember where I am. Early or late, day or night really doesn't matter - its the visual confirmation of, "yes, indeed. I am certainly not home." Usually the view is interesting in some way, and I kind of nod at my day and move on. I've started to appreciate the banal multiplicity of these vistas and decided to share them with you. The one above was from my stay in St. Paul, MN on 7/9-10. I'll likely add one from tomorrow's night in our favorite cow-town, Columbus, OH.

There are times, such as this one during a stay at trade show for IMPAC in 2006, where you have a calming, beachy view. This is a nice touch during the day, because you are usually stuck in a tradeshow booth in a ballroom and can't enjoy the beachy goodness. There is solace in being able to enjoy the ocean at night, which is mighty fine with me. These locales make up for visits to place like Cedar Rapids, IA where the olfactory dimension kicks in and in addition to the view of the General Mills factory you get to alternately smell cooking dog food and captain crunch. Seriously though, I love my friends in the old C.R. its just their city commonly smells like ass.

At any rate, there have been some really incredible views. On an IMPAC trip to London in 2006 I snapped this out the window of my room at the Marriott across from Parliment & Big Ben and next to The Eye. It was a great trip and worth getting yelled at in every accent available on the British Isles. Because of the dogsh*t value of the dollar, at the time the room was like $600 U.S. and was the size of most folk's coat closet. I can't even begin to imagine how much that room goes for now. I actually regret not taking a picture of the raggedy-ass hotel in Crawley that we always used. However it was of limited aesthetic value and not really worth the photo. Or so it seemed at the time - in retrospect the gritty, plainness of it all was a statement unto itself. I have to go back as a tourist. There we so many things to see and most of them I was witness to went by in the blur of the train window. Maybe go back and do a photographic series of neighborhood pubs. A pint or four along the way might do the soul good if not the body.

One more beachy shot. This was from an IMPAC trip to another practice in the Carolinas. There was a Marriott that had a special down from the site and, luckily we had to start early Wednesday morning. The evening I was able to spend before the engagement was very nice and mellow, if a bit chilly. I don't think I can ever get enough of the Carolinas, and they sure have a leg up on the Kansas Cities of the world. Its not that K.C. is really all that bad, it just lacks panache. I mean, St. Paul actually was a pretty cool town. So what's your excuse, Kalamazoo? Even Nashville has the Parthenon, Robert's Western Wear and other cool backdrops. Dig yourself out of the hole, Omaha!So look out for the series. I will try and post from my next few trips to see if there is anything interesting. Peace.

Kids & Such

Ok, we all know that kids do funny stuff that makes you laugh. They also do a lot of stuff that makes you cry. But John and Aly have really been cracking me up of late. Here are some pics of why. John was playing with the Luna the cat's playcubes. He loves to put them on like a robot suit and try to walk around - too funneh! He has this goofy smile and laugh now that is just out of this world. He's completely at the stage where he KNOWS he's funny and watches for you to react. He is also touching my heart of late. I was able to see him on Wednesday night and while we were at his house he got out his bubble-making grill (its a long story) and said, "I want to blow bubbles with my daddy." Well, you can imagine the waterworks that ensued - I miss the little goofball. I have him on Sunday this week and as long as it doesn't rain (again!) we should be going to the big pool at the health club with the waterslides and such. He loves it there - I will try and have some pictures for you.

Aly went to her first prom this year and showed what a lovely young lady she is becoming. She is well on her way to being a lawyer as well, as I cannot win any argument with her that doesn't end with "Because I said so."


So anyway, here is her at the prom - I couldn't resist the other two pictures though!





So, my time has been taken up in a very good way with my new bike and enjoying the summertime. I purchased a 2005 Harley Davidson Dyna Super Glide Custom from Liberty Harley Davidson. It is an awesome bike and just as liberating as the commercials make them seem. I've been spending time on it, chilling on my new porch furnature and hanging out with the kids.

One Degree of Separation

So, I’m sitting in the hotel bar last night (no jokes about “big surprise there” allowed) with my associate Michael Martin here in San Francisco and was reminded once more what a freakishly small world it is. We struck up a conversation with a man named John MacDonald from Glasgow. He was hilarious and entertaining and turned out to be a cellular biologist working in Montreal. We chatted for an hour or so before another gentleman joined us at the bar. He overheard our conversation and asked John where he went to school. It turns out that he was from the UK, also a cellular biologist and that they both went to Washington University in St. Louis and did their post-doctorate work under the same professor – just a decade apart. How is it that in a random dive hotel bar off Union Square two men who literally spent years of their life in the same classrooms would intersect? Odd.

That same day in the trade show booth, we started talking to the folks in the adjacent space. One of the women in that booth was from Chicago but after speaking with her, she stated that she had lived in Denver. When Michael asked more about the where’s and when’s he discovered that they actually had lived within a block of each other and had common friends – again that one degree just temporally displaced.

What’s the point of these musings? I suppose that it is just interesting that in this vast and incredibly overcrowded world we live in that the threads of our lives and past can intertwine in these myriad ways. As cliché as the “six degrees of separation” term has become it has a firm foundation in truth. I guess one of the cool things about being obnoxiously outgoing is that you can really discover those connections. So the next time you are standing next to someone in line, strike up a conversation – you never know who you might run into!

Lightning Strikes in Cleveland

Last night in Cleveland, Asdrubal Cabrera pulled off the most rare play in baseball - the unassisted triple play. Its happened only 14 times in the entire history of MLB, and its the third time the Indians have made it happen. In fact, the Indians have been involved with 6 of the 14 unassisted triple plays - three by them and three against them.

The last time an Indians' player accomplished the feat in the regular season was 1909. The only time it has happened in the history of postseason play was when an Indians player turned one in the World Series in 1920. Not thinking about the importance of the event, Cabrera flipped the ball into the stands on his way to the dugout - some lucky fan has a very rare slice of baseball history.

In these tough and troubled times, baseball endures as a shining example of America's spirit - uplifting us all. To quote Annie Savoy from Bull Durham, "Walt Whitman once said, 'I see great things in baseball. It's our game, the American game. It will repair our losses and be a blessing to us.' You could look it up." (Yes, I know you are arching your eyebrows at steriod and drug abuse and such, nonetheless) We will overlook the irony that the player who pulled it off isn't a citizen - he's still part of the simmering melting pot whether the xenophobes like it or not...

Which One Is More Frightening?

Actually, I think they both are because the common denominator is the dude holding the magazine.

Sorry for the radio silence over the past month...work and life has been over the top with bizzyness(sic). I haven't had time to breathe, let alone blog. I did think I would take a moment just to say hi and not get real deep into anything.

There has been lots of travel to various places fun and not-so-fun (San Fran, Charlotte, Chicago, Philly and more); an Entrain and B52s concert; lots of play time and swimming with JW; time spent with Aly doing the dad thing, playing Rock Band and watching Arrested Development (which just happens to be the best show ever made for television (and yes, even better than The Simpsons...)); and two Indians games including opening day!

So anyway, its been nuts but lots of fun along the way. Life in general for all of us has been a bit crazy too - case in point being the rapacious gasoline prices. They are hovering around $3.70 here at this point in time - up about 20 cents in the past 5 days. I loved the head of Shell telling the news folks that they have no idea why gas prices are rising out of control just after posing another record profit...C'mon!

Oh well, a lie takes two people, one to lie and one to listen...

Ok - back to work. I'm off to Columbus tonight for yet another mini-trade show at a conference sponsored by my old employer, the OSMA. It will be an interesting little reunion. I haven't seen most of those folks for years. I'm sure it will be like the line from Gross Point Blank - "Everyone looked the same, its just like they all swelled..." At least I'm staying in a Hilton - no,no,no I didn't mean Paris...I'll blog atcha more in a bit. Peace.

Home is where the what now is?

Home: A place where one lives; a residence. The physical structure within which one lives, such as a house or apartment. A dwelling place together with the family or social unit that occupies it; a household; An environment offering security and happiness; A valued place regarded as a refuge or place of origin; The place, such as a country or town, where one was born or has lived for a long period.

Home is an interesting concept. While driving from PA to Columbus with my boss today, he asked how I came to be in Ohio. When I mentioned that it was the longest I had really lived in one place he said, "Well, I suppose that it's home then..." I paused, and I'm still not sure how to answer.

What is home to you? I'm curious because the traditional model is where you grew up, but we kind of moved around. Mom and Dad are now in FL and that's certainly not home for me (although it one day might be). My brother and sis-in-law live in NC and that's not home to them or me - hopefully they will make their way North at some point as well. My birthplace of Huntington, WV was "home" for all intents and purposes for a while but now that Granny has moved away and we don't have family there, well that's not home either. I used to think of Lewisburg (where I spent my teens) as home but after my brief visit there this past summer I realize that's certainly not home.

Sigh...

Anyway, is home where you live at the time - where all of your shit resides? Not necesarily, as my shit is currently in a temporary locale. Is it where the preponderence of your family is? That makes a little sense, because that sense of togetherness that informs the concept of home can be found by being with them - as long as you like your family and enjoy their company.

Not to be too obtuse (stop laughing please), but I'm starting to think that "home" resides within the self. The saying, "Wherever you go, there you are" is a very factual and honest assesment. If you are unhappy at your physical 'home', then perhaps when you go to work it is that place where you feel most comfortable - but is work 'home'? However, I can't imagine that someone in Leavenworth thinks of their little 6 x 8 cell as 'home', but unless they are at peace with themselves internally can anything really be 'home' to them...or any of us?

Perhaps the concept of 'home' is similar to the concept of 'happiness' - both are rather vague in their true meaning and have a varied sense of power and satisfaction behind them...as in, "Is anyone ever truly happy?" I welcome your opinions, reader, as the shades of grey surrounding both terms are so subjective I think they might differ slightly for everyone - and for each of those people mean different things as they move through their lives. What once was home for me in both reality and concept is no longer - I feel that I carry my 'home' within my self.

Additionally, what once made me 'happy' no longer carries the power to do so to the same extent. Whether we become slightly numbed to those 'happy' catalysts through familiarity or repetition, we commonly seek new pathways for happiness throughout our lives. Its a common part of our personal growth and maturity. "For ye shall put away childish things..." as an example of the age-old nature of this phenomenon. The primary variance with the 'happiness' statement is the time I spend with my children and even that time spent has its highs and lows.

So what has all of this mental meandering accomplished? Not very much to be quite honest. However, I do hope its brought you to a brief pause to consider what 'home' and 'happiness' mean to you...in the past, present and future.

Can someone tell me what's so funny about this picture and caption?

Photo and caption from CNN.com. I'm from WV so I can make this comment and not be mean...


Arkansas flood damage
at $2 million and rising

Let's Go...Mountaineers!

Proof positive that WVU cheerleaders do, in fact, have teeth...

Duke Beats WVU?



Wee WAHHHH!



OK, enough picture goodness. The fact is, a very well coached WVU team put a normally very well coached Duke team to bed today. Coach K in all of his Blue Devil splendor couldn't hold off the sober, if puffy, Bobby Huggins. I am so proud of our boys - most of whom are from NJ and FL - as they managed to make a very strong second-half statement against a highly regarded Duke squad.

Next brings an Xavier team to the floor - a team that just flat out opened up a can of 'whup ass' on Perdue today. Methinks that this will be a fantastic game. Lay your money on WVU as they seem to be a team on a mission, playing above the rim both literally and figuartively. A potential Elite Eight matchup against UCLA would be promoted as the game of the tournament. I can see Beverly Hillbillies tie-ins already...

Come and listen to a story about a man named Bob
A poor Mountaineer, barely kept his team ahead,
Then one day his boys was a'shootin at some hoops,
And up through the ground came a bubblin blue.

Duke that is, blue n' white, NC team.

Well the first thing you know ol Bob's a millionaire,
Kinfolk said "Bob'll make 'em play up there"
Said "San Antony is the place you ought to be"
So they loaded up the truck and made the Final Four-a'yeee!

Finals, that is. bettin' pools, ESPN highlight reels.

Well now its time to say good by to Bob and all his kin.
And they would like to thank the balls fer kindly droppin in.
You're all invited back a-gain to this sports facility
To have a heapin helpin of their hospitality
Mountaineers that is. Final Four, Take your hats off.

Y'all win it all now, y'hear?

Why WVU Matches up Best with UCLA to get to Final Four

I Wanna Easter Egg!

Actually, I do - because then I could make egg salad. Those who know me well are quite conversant with my constant struggle with spirituality of all types. I'm convinced it was the four years of study in Marshall's Humanities program that literally flogged the religion out of me - well, that and common sense. I like to think now that as a pragmatic positivist that we offer the best of ourselves to the common good and it has a greater impact on the world. That which we call karma makes sense even if only as a balm for the soul to overcome internal guilt over sins past, present and future.

Without getting into a full-blown religious dialogue at this point, let's just chat a moment about our current holiday and how it came to be. Like nearly all major Christian holidays, Easter is the result of an absorption of several 'pagan' rites and rituals from many of the areas where the newfangled religion was being propagated. In order to co-opt the local populace, the early church mirrored the local customs and claimed a parallel vision of events - relational religion so to speak. With the patience of, well Job I suppose, they knew that over time the rites would merge and become one with the beliefs of the locals and they would eventually come into the church. Quite ingenious, really.

Easter's origins come from several streams of myth and faith - a'la Joseph Campbell - and all surrounding the Spring Equinox. As noted in the following excerpt, even the mythology surrounding the death and resurrection is a bit plagiarized:

"Many, perhaps most, Pagan religions in the Mediterranean area had a major seasonal day of religious celebration at or following the Spring Equinox. Cybele, the Phrygian fertility goddess, had a fictional consort who was believed to have been born via a virgin birth. He was Attis, who was believed to have died and been resurrected each year during the period MAR-22 to MAR-25. "About 200 B.C. mystery cults began to appear in Rome just as they had earlier in Greece. Most notable was the Cybele cult centered on Vatican hill ...Associated with the Cybele cult was that of her lover, Attis (the older Tammuz, Osiris, Dionysus, or Orpheus under a new name). He was a god of ever-reviving vegetation. Born of a virgin, he died and was reborn annually. The festival began as a day of blood on Black Friday and culminated after three days in a day of rejoicing over the resurrection."

Even the name of the holiday is derived from the goddesses associated with the coming fecundity, such as:

The name "Easter" originated with the names of an ancient Goddess and God. The Venerable Bede, (672-735 CE.) a Christian scholar, first asserted in his book De Ratione Temporum that Easter was named after Eostre (a.k.a. Eastre). She was the Great Mother Goddess of the Saxon people in Northern Europe. Similarly, the "Teutonic dawn goddess of fertility [was] known variously as Ostare, Ostara, Ostern, Eostra, Eostre, Eostur, Eastra, Eastur, Austron and Ausos."

Such was the life of the early Christian leader and scholar - how shall we rewrite history and myth to grow our market space? Like the current ability of marketing executives to emulate their popular rivals and make their name a mainstream term representing the general concept to 'steal its mythological power', i.e. xerox, kleenex, etc. the Christian leadership followed an incredible campaign of growth and vision.

Kudos to the world's first marketing gurus! Happy Estrus!

Its March...and its MADNESS!!!

Can I tell you just how freaking awesome March Madness really is? Technically the dance hasn't even started and already the Conference Tournaments are ratcheting up the tension. Let's just all bask in the glory that is the next few weeks of awesome roundball.

That is all...

The Odyssey

View out the back porch window after the storm...

Having spent four days in San Fran for a conference where I basically stood in a booth and performed demonstrations until I was hoarse, I was ready to fly home. I was hoping the red-eye was not going to destroy me like they usually do, counting on being able to sleep some in my complementary upgraded seat. Oh, but the ghods had other things in mind.

Upon arriving at SFO I was informed that there was a problem with my Detroit-Cleveland leg - that being the ticket agents could see it but it had a 'mystery code'. After 45 minutes of sleuthing on the part of the ticket agent, they figured out it meant that the flight was cancelled. Lovely.

After further review, we determined there were no really good ways to get me home. Most would have me arriving Sunday afternoon or Monday morning. With so many cancellations due to the impending storm and very full flights all weekend there were no good options for empty seats. We finally settled on SFO to Newark with the logic that they had the most flights to CLE should the Newark - CLE leg go South. Foresight? Not.

After arriving in Newark from the flight from hell - bumpy, long and red-eye-ish - I managed to stumble to my connecting flight. Once again, getting the last minute complimentary upgrade and sitting in first with a (virgin) bloody mary and a nice seat I felt a surge of confidence as we taxied to the runway. Silly me! Once we arrived at runway 251s we were turned back to the gate - cancelled. Rebooking was a nightmare - no real options aside from MONDAY NIGHT!

Myself and four other intrepid adventurers opted to fly into Pittsburgh and drive the 1.5 hours home. That flight was an adventure in itself - with both flight attendants getting knocked to the floor with turbulence and the beverage cart crashing into the wall and spilling crap everywhere. At one point, as I was in the very back seat of the plane, myself and another guy were helping the hapless Stew stay on the floor while the plane tried its best to cast us all up to the ceiling. Nice.

Arriving in P-burgh was a relief, albeit a short-lived one. Snow began to spit from an angry sky as I drove out of the rental car lot in my nondescript, but all-wheel-drive, Saturn. With every mile it built itself into a real snowfall. At the Ohio border the snow went from being an annoyance to a real concern. The closer I came to Cleveland, the more hazardous things became - but stopping at this point was not an option.

After nearly three hours of driving I arrived home to find huge drifts blocking my driveway. After five attempts, forward and back, I was able to shove the rental car into the driveway. Opening the door of the car was an adventure as the snow was well above the doorwell. I stepped out of the car to accumulation above my knees and slogged into the house covered in heavy, wet snow.

The next morning was an adventure into itself with driving back up to CLE to get my redirected bags (one of which is destroyed) and my car. However, by this point the sun was shining and things were a little better on the roads.

Is there a lesson here? Not really. The only thing that I did note was that after years of traveling like this that I was able to not get stressed/pissed/angry. Grain of salt, baby. Grain of Salt...

Deck after the storm...

Looking out of the garage...

Down the street...

The last one...

It's Three AM - and the phone rings in the White House...

In a complete reversal of an earlier position I had regarding Sen. Clinton's re-emergence after the Texas debate two weeks ago, I am now declaring her to be in a state of dismal panic. Her performance in the CSU debate was heinous - she was shrill, defensive, and belligerent and overall appeared desperate.

What happened in those few short days between events? Well, she lost a couple of primaries for one. The press lauded the momentum factor of Obama and displayed an increasingly panicked Clinton for the nation to watch, cringing. Her husband made a gaffe or two along the way while Obama kept racking up key endorsements, including the all-mighty Teamsters’ Union which had always been in the (Male) Clinton camp.

It has been difficult to watch. No more so than what we all tuned into CNN this morning in the form of a story about Clinton’s most recent TV ad running in Texas. As shot after shot of sleeping children flashes on the screen, the narrator drones ominously:

“Its three AM and your children are safe and asleep. But there’s a phone in the White House and its ringing. Something’s happening in the world. Your vote will decide who answers that call. Whether its someone who already knows the worlds leaders, knows the military, someone tested and ready to lead in a dangerous world…Etc, etc. Ad nauseum…”

In case you want to feel sick to your stomach, here is the ad:

Clinton's Ad

This is the worst sort of fearmongering and it is much more what we would expect out of a hawkish Republican campaign rather than a Democratic Party candidate. I was waiting for the child picking petals off a flower and the ensuing mushroom cloud to finish off the spot. Of course, it ends instead with a still of Hillary with the phone to her ear looking well made up, dressed and smiling for her hypothetical three AM call. It would have been more real had they shown her in bed with tousled hair, swollen unmade face, and the lump of Bill under the covers next to her. However, that was not to be…

Obama’s response actually references some of her ad’s visuals without the dire warnings attached.

Obama's Response

It reminds the viewers that Hillary actually supported the Iraq war, making the point that the ‘real threat’ of the Taliban and Al Qaeda in Afghanistan was ignored as a result. He makes the point that ‘…we have had a ‘red phone’ moment and it was the decision to invade Iraq’ and that Hillary made the wrong choice. He emphasizes that it’s not a matter of experience; it’s a matter of judgment. He’s right – she’s wrong…on this and more. He develops into a stronger candidate on a daily basis, and not just by his actions. Clinton’s negative posturing seems to be pushing more and more voters to his side. Get ready for McCain vs. Obama in November.

Faux News Sinks to a New Low

I don't watch Fox News - I personally consider it the National Enquirer of the television press. In fact, to even call it Fox 'news' is counter-intuitive, like military intelligence or jumbo shrimp. Their plainly partisan and twisted view of the world reflects much more the agenda of Rupert Murdoch and his ilk than any jounalistic ideal. It seems like everyone but its adherents know this, and they have been lampooned in many forums, including my favorite show The Simpsons.

On any dictionary site, you can get a true definition of the word 'news' as follows:

news /nuz, nyuz/ –noun (usually used with a singular verb)1. a report of a recent event; intelligence; information:

Feel free to send this to the producers, editors and writers with Fox, as they obviously wouldn't know 'news' if it bit them on the ass...

So it was with great disdain that I was basically captured into watching Fox last night at the gym. I was on the elliptical machine in front of a giant TV showing disaster after disaster on the screen. The caption was "Is God punishing us through natural disasters? Floods, earthquakes, tornadoes?" The closed captioning was on and they were interviewing some Reverand Billy that was citing biblical references to justify the answer as being 'yes'. Basically God is pissed off at our permissive and sinful ways and is dropping F4 tornadoes on trailer parks in Arkansas as a result. The very fact that the earthquake yesterday hit the most sinful state of the union, Nevada, was also noted to be a 'sign' of God's displeasure.

What I found interesting is that the Fox anchor suckled this pap like it was mother's milk. Any other network would not have had this ass-clown on their show, let alone even entertain the ludicrous premise. Yet, here was some Fox news, community-college journalism degree idiot pandering to the Rev. Billy's jackassery. I suppose the true shame is that so many folks really believe this, and all of the other tripe, piled on by this supposed news network. No, not a shame. Shame is the wrong word here. Terrifying maybe? Yeah, that fits better.

Please, reader, go vote this November so the Christian Right for Life New Baptist Hate Gays in the Military idiots don't get their way for another 8 years...

The Ho-Bama Debate - Hillary Comes Into Her Own

Last night's Democratic Candidate Debate in Austin, TX was like watching the New York Yankees play your kid's little league baseball team. Hillary kept hitting the ball out of the park, and Obama was the hapless pitcher on the mound turning his head to watch as yet another homer flies over the fence.

It was by far the best public performance we have seen from Hillary so far - she was poised, articulate, passionate and convincing. Her ability to think on her feet, especially speaking in rebuttal, was very impressive. Most important for the survival of her flagging campaign, she was able to clearly hit the main areas of pain and interest in both the audience and the nation.

At the other podium was a seemingly unprepared Obama. He struggled in answering what seemed to be even the most basic questions and had a very difficult time in rebuttal. It seemed at times that he had to fight to articulate each sentence, each word in his attempt to define his message. It was unlike his performances in stump speaches where he is smooth and self-assured. However, it was consistent with his performance in previous debates where pundits nearly always hand Hillary the mantle of the victor. Even the little debate tricks like pretending to take notes when your opponent is speaking, feigning disinterest, were unable to nibble at the powerful performance put on by the senior Senator.

The primary question (excuse the pun) remains to be answered, "Will this debate and the inevitable analysis of it have an impact on the TX and OH primaries?" Methinks, yes. If it will be enough to salvage her gasping campaign is another matter entirely. If anything, it should be fun to watch.

No Man Left Behind?

I had a wonderful conversation with my father Saturday morning during which he mentioned an article about the Marine Corps command structure deliberately delaying the mass deployment of Mine-Resistant Ambush Protected trucks (MRAPs). The reasons, as seen below, are estimated to have resulted in the unnecessary deaths of hundreds of men and women in Iraq and Afghanistan. For the sake of protecting other vehicle weapons platform programs they deemed more important and due to their general ineptitude, someone's son or daughter isn't coming home alive or is coming home gravely wounded and permanently disabled.

I don't really have anything to say about this as the article speaks for itself. The next time Bush and his asinine cronies want to point fingers at the Dems and say their delays in budget approvals for the war are costing lives, please spread this to those who would listen to that sort of jackassery.

Pull quotes from the article, just to get you started...

• The Combat Development Command, which decides what gear to buy, treated the MRAP as an expensive obstacle to long-range plans for equipment that was more mobile and fit into the Marines Corps' vision as a rapid reaction force. Those projects included a Humvee replacement called the Joint Light Tactical Vehicle and a new vehicle for reconnaissance and surveillance missions.

• An urgent February 2005 request for MRAPs got lost in bureaucracy. It was signed by then-Brig. Gen. Dennis Hejlik, who asked for 1,169 of the vehicles. The Marines could not continue to take "serious and grave casualties" caused by IEDs when a solution was commercially available, wrote Hejlik, who was a commander in western Iraq from June 2004 to February 2005. Gayl cites documents showing Hejlik's request was shuttled to a civilian logistics official at the Marine Corps Combat Development Command in suburban Washington who had little experience with military vehicles. As a result, there was more concern over how the MRAP would upset the Marine Corps' supply and maintenance chains than there was in getting the troops a truck that would keep them alive, the study contends.

• The study does not say precisely how many Marine casualties Gayl thinks occurred due to the lack of MRAPs, which have V-shaped hulls that deflect blasts out and away from the vehicles. Gayl cites a March 1, 2007, memo from Conway to Gen. Peter Pace, then the chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, in which Conway said 150 service members were killed and an additional 1,500 were seriously injured in the prior nine months by IEDs while traveling in vehicles.

Sigh...

CNN Article Here

Armytimes Article